I woke up one morning to what sounded like the smoke alarm. The air was smoky. Starting with the basement I immediately sought the source. I checked the storage and laundry rooms but not even those alarms were triggered. Moving to the living room I noted the sound was louder; but the alarm wasn’t triggered. I checked the bedroom then went outside to check if I was seeing smoke from another fire. It was as thick outside as inside.
Noticing a lady two doors down, I asked if she saw the smoke in the air. With a very strange look she denied seeing any smoke. I walked around. Not believing she couldn’t see it, I asked again, which elicited the same response. Irritated I went back in the house, got my cat, threw him the backseat of my car, and called the fire department.
Several firemen searched all three floors of the house but they didn’t see the smoke either. They checked all alarms to find them operable, but discovered a malfunctioning carbon monoxide detector in the living room.
After they left I was still wondering why everybody else didn’t see this smoke; by now I’m convinced I smell it. So I’m walking around talking out loud about not understanding why everybody else can’t see this smoke; I mean it’s even all outside.
Eventually, I rubbed my eyes and discovered I’d slept in these cheap contacts I bought at the beauty supply store. They always cloud up if I leave them in overnight. Once I removed them my vision began to clear up and I realized I must have looked fourteen-carat crazy, eyes big as saucers, talking about non-existent smoke. I’m irritated with folks who were seeing clearly. But in my own little world smoke was infiltrating the world!
Folks, until I rubbed by eyes you couldn’t have told me I was wrong! What a boss knucklehead! I would have given my life standing on my own truth that the house and the whole outdoors were full of smoke! When I finally woke up and joined the rest of civilization, I felt like an even bigger nut case than I must have looked! Ok . . . while you’re laughing, two words: You too!
This demonstrates so well the phenomena I call Stuck on Stupid. That’s how blind we are to our own mess. We see everybody else’s problem but our own. Now, you know how strange I must have looked to everybody from the firemen on down.
Think about how we look to others when we are entrenched in our own unrealistic perception. The way our characters get twisted from all the things we go through is played out in how we live and how we relate to others; but we don’t see it.
Denial is a dangerous state of mind because, generally, everybody but you sees there’s something wrong. Yet, nobody but you can change it.
Next time we talk about the six fail proof steps to reclaiming and unleashing your power to flip the script on painful here-we-go-again relationships and unlock the destiny you deserve!
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